Exit Zero
              

          I’ve been putting off writing the last edition of the column for summer, 2002 because I hate when the summer ends.  By putting off the last edition, I thought that maybe I could extend the summer a few more weeks.  It hardly seems possible that it is over.  But it is…..

            So much has been going on over the last few weeks that I hardly know where to begin.  Let’s see….I hear that Shady O’s is in an uproar since Dennis and Connie broke up.  Or did I hear that Connie was in the uproar and Dennis ain’t broke up?  Nonetheless, Dennis is back on the market and that is a good thing.  And, was that Connie arguing with Cape May’s favorite “Closet Whore”?  So, what’s a “Closet Whore” anyway? None of our whores need to be in the closet in Cape May.  

            Just when one good guy goes on the market another one comes off.  What’s up with that?  Rumors bouncing around town have it that one of the big hunks will be changing diapers next spring.  We’ll see.

            Speaking of diapers…Iris had her baby and the word is that he is gorgeous.  I am guessing here, but I bet the baby looks like mommy.

            So, does Wendy O Wanda have a balance problem or does she enjoy lying in the grass at Congress Hall?  I am sure I saw her face down on that beautiful new lawn.  Speaking of Congress Hall, Patrick Ford is bartending at the Boiler Room.  Now that is a good thing.  Lord knows Patrick has some knowledge of adult beverages.  It took most of the summer but I think the new watering hole has worked out the kinks.

            Carney’s was strange the last few weeks of the summer.  One night there was even a cat fight between two 50 year old trailer trash bitches.  Somehow they are seeping out of Wildwood.  Last weekend it was like a troll festival.  Do they have new doormen?  I thought you were supposed to be good looking and rich to get in there?

            Corey Smith (hey Michael, is that Corey or Corky?) finally ties the knot this weekend.  We all have our fingers crossed and send lots of good wishes. 

            In all, it was a good summer.  The weather was bright and beautiful.  The tans were deeper than ever.  Tony is still hairy.  Tommy and Nichole have a beautiful new house.  Marcello’s still isn’t engaged.  We all got to see the twins again.  Danny and Annie are still dating.  Danny and Annie are both still alive.  Jeff learned to speak Polish.  Wendy never officially run into the police. We adopted two great girls from the big apple.  Mycle and Ron got a new puppy.  And, nobody lost an eye.

     I’m off to some other beach.  Be safe and happy. Till next summer.

                                                                                    Anita Liphe’

PS—Maybe next summer I’ll get invited to a few dance parties.  That is if that Closet Bitch Nichole remembers to put me on the guest list.  

Exit Zero Archives

    posted September 21st 2002